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and I can't breathe enough

by Cosmopaark

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1.
Stepped out of this stressful nest, 
Do you have concrete plans ?
 I would like to travel through time.
 I’m so lonely now, again
 It keeps me awake, tonight

 Sunrise burns my eyes, again 
Lazy, I can’t move, today Take me somewhere we could run away I miss nothing that has changed anyway Take me somewhere we could run away I miss nothing that has changed anyway
2.
Stuck in a haunted house where nothing comes out Habits are your strongest ropes there is no doubt Can you sell your smile to the highest bidder ? Leave it here and put it there for something better Heat from the inside, no one can be found anymore You can just denied, no one will be fine anymore Take a look at the ghost : there’s nothing in it Let it go, lose control, it doesn’t exist I don’t wanna be someone else I don’t want to hear someone else Heat from the inside, no one can be found anymore You can just denied, no one will be fine anymore Heat from the inside, no one can be found, no one can be found You can just denied, no one will be fine anymore
3.
Suffocating 04:58
Vision splitting 
Suffocating What is real ? 
Am I leaving ? Here we go again, one more time today What is going on ? Can it just go away ? I don’t know 
I don’t know Vision splitting 
Suffocating What is real ? 
Am I leaving ? Are you afraid to watch your mind disappear ? I’m so far from handling all this fear I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know 
I don’t know I don’t know 
I don’t know
4.
Far 03:47
Far, behind the white screen Try, when you are near It seems like I’ve never been here Washed out, burnt by the sunlight Start out, you’ll never be alright It seems like I’ve never been here Ouhou Ouhou I feel the sun behind my glass suit I feel so dumb behind my glass suit now
 Ouhou Ouhou It seems like I’ve never been here Ouhou Ouhou I feel the sun behind my glass suit I feel so dumb behind my glass suit now

5.
Sorry 02:05
I remembered the things I said, Not everything seems to be fair And I feel sorry, if you believed me I didn't really know that I could awaken your deepest scars And I feel sorry, if you believed me And you must have been somehow Stronger than I thought you were Stronger but i didn't care
6.
Can't Wait 03:34
When the light’s out And everything’s calm Feed the empty speech Meeting someone Leave when you can Eaten by a leech I can’t wait Confusional Losing your mind You can't blame yourself Growing fears shots Blending my thoughts I can’t blame myself I can’t wait
7.
Big Boy 05:55
You said one more time : “you’re a big boy now” But I didn't understand what the meaning was I don’t care You said : don’t be sad you have to be brave but I never know how, you seem afraid I need air It was a bit confusing but it couldn't be clearer Treasure chests full of mirrors Let me stay I saw the starless night, sunless day I had to fix this quickly, disperse the haze Not today Drag boxes full of memories Don’t drown you underneath I can see your finger on the lens On a picture with your friends
 Drag boxes full of memories Don’t drown you underneath It’s like a mountain to climb never to come back Weights on your feet, never react Cross It There are some warm shadows who don’t wanna leave you The brittle ones that you always knew Behind it Drag boxes full of memories Don’t drown you underneath I can see your finger on the lens On a picture with your friends Drag boxes full of memories Don’t drown you underneath
8.
Backseat 04:02
Lying on the backseat The stars are drab and I can’t sleep Drying my heavy eyes I think about the things I’ve denied Weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough, I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough Inside intricate thoughts It's a big mess that I don't wanna cross Two tries, it's not hard enough One more thing I have to rise above
 Weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough, (I feel) I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough, I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough, I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough, I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough, I feel weaker than a dead leaf And I cannot breathe enough
9.
Not Fixed 04:07
as dreaming Watching your face disappear 
I was lazy
 Or too scared to face the fear
 All the pictures are gone
 All the pictures left 

I was sitting
 On the edge of my bed
 You were leaving 
I don’t remember what you said
 All the pictures are gone 
All the pictures left


 

I don’t want to fix
 My memories are sick 
I don’t want to fix
 My memories are sick If the dream is over
 Why can’t I overcome it
 Maybe it’s real
 And i’m too afraid to admit 
It doesn’t matter anymore
 It doesn’t matter now

 It was soothing And I feel so guilty now Was I dreaming ? I wish to change one’s mind somehow 
It doesn’t matter anymore
 It doesn’t matter now

 I don’t want to fix
 My memories are sick 
I don’t want to fix
 My memories are sick But it isn’t real, it’s a memory, just a memory
10.
Try 03:25
A slice of wild light But you can’t lie, It’s already gone Try to fulfill the void, Your eyes will dry Even if you're wrong Tell me where did it go, If you create the whole trick It smells like bittersweet memory, How dare you fall asleep ? Inside, for no reason You could lie and never feel it. Sometimes, while you fell into Something that doesn't exist.

credits

released January 20, 2023

All songs and lyrics by Cosmopaark
Clément Pelofy on guitars, vocals and synths
Baptiste Sauvion on drums and percussion
Rémi Lemoine on bass, vocals and synths

Mix by Clément Fortin
Master by Alexis Bardinet at Globe Audio

Cover Art by Suji Park

Howlin' Banana Records, Flippin' Freaks Records, Stellar Frequencies

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Cosmopaark Bordeaux, France

Shoegaze

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